Changing the world. Is it too big of a dream ? To actually do something that the lives of people all around the world, and have them remember you for it. To have your name recorded forever in the annals of time of the dusty pages of history. This sudden inspiration came from literally out of nowhere, and everywhere at once. In the 3th century AD, there came a self proclaimed "Prophet" called Mani. This Mani just appeared out of nowhere and changed the status quo overnight. At a time where the worship of twin gods was the fashion in Persia, Mani proclaimed love and equality for everyone and respect of all gods. And the fascinating part of his story was that the Emperor of the time allowed him to preach his sermons all over his empire, even though it was in direct conflict with the state's official religion. His religion, Manicheasnism, grew into a world religion that rivaled Christianity in strength. Nowadays, no one remembers Mani or what he has achieved through his lifetime, but just one person changed the world by his hand. Is it too ambitious to dream of that ?
Today I went to a hospital to visit an old and sick relative. I was struck and amazed by just how....beautiful the place was. All over the place the name of Allah was literally everywhere. On the walls, in paintings, in every Qu'ran put in every room and even written the exterior of the building itself. What ruined that experience was finding my old aunt in a room all buy herself. A very old and wised woman, she was diagnosed with cancer a while ago, and in and out of the hospital it was for her. The thing is she was all by herself. Completely alone. Is this how it all ends ? In a hospital room by myself ? What will my legacy be ? Right, I leave my children and their children to this life after giving birth to them, but is that all ? I mean, what happened to the Muslim civilization of days old ? I read and see what these people have done in the past and I think; why not me ? What am I doing to deserve their recognition ? How can I change the world ? And the more I think of it, the more I just draw... a blank. I need purpose and direction, neither of which I can find here and now.
(This post was written on the 1st of December 07. The aunt I mentioned passed away a couple of weeks ago. May God bless her and guide her into heaven.)
